Where Americans Met Their Husbands And Wives

With more than 2 million weddings a year in the USA, it’s only natural to wonder where all those husbands and wives met.

 That’s why we’ve analyzed data from Polly to find out where people are finding lasting love. We also learned a little more about the people who responded, looking at their age, where they live, and other demographics.

1. Where US couple met their marital partners
2. Nearly a third of married couples met in a nightclub
3. Online dating the second most popular place to meet
4. Over 16% of married couples met in a bar
5. More than 13% of people met their spouse through mutual friends
6. Fewer than 10% of married couples met at school
7. Almost 4% of people met their husband or wife while traveling
8. Nearly 3% of people met their spouse at a social event
9. Over 2% of marital partners met at work
10. Only 2.4% of people met their husband or wife at church
11. Most respondents were age 65 or older
12. Florida had the highest number of respondents
13. Wives 44% more open about where they met their husbands
14. Low-income earners had the highest response rate
15. How Polly works

Where US couples met their marital partners

Polly’s data was gathered by surveying 494,874 people in the US for 12 months, ending on May 20, 2024. This graph reveals how many couples met in specific places, from the most popular to the least.

Nearly a third of married couples met in a nightclub

Polly’s data revealed that 31.2% of people met their husband or wife in a nightclub. What the data doesn’t indicate is when those meetings happened. That said, one of the few studies of the psychological reasons why people go clubbing found that the number of couples who left a nightclub over a few nights was as much as 50% higher than the number of couples who had arrived at the club. 

It’s also not surprising that this is where most couples met, considering that in the US, there were 67,531 bars and nightclubs in operation in 2023. On average, this industry has also grown 0.9% per year for the last five years, proving just how popular these meeting places are.

Online dating the second most popular place to meet 

According to Polly, 17% of people in the USA met their spouse through online dating. This is quite a big difference in numbers from those meeting in a nightclub, and it’s also a slightly more conservative figure than what the Pew Research Center found. A 2023 report revealed that 30% of partnered Americans, including those who are married, living with a partner, or in a committed relationship, met their spouse or partner through online dating. 

The center’s findings also indicated that 44% of users said that meeting a long-term partner was one of the main reasons they used online dating sites and apps. 40% said that another reason was casual dating, while 24% said they were looking for casual sex, and 22% said they hoped to make new friends. 

Over 16% of married couples met in a bar

Only a point five of a percent difference from those meeting online, 16.5% of the 494,874 people surveyed said they met their husband or wife in a bar. However, this finding is more than double that of the Pew Research Center, which found that, in 2020, only 8% of people it surveyed had met their spouse or partner in this kind of establishment. 

More than 13% of people met their spouse through mutual friends

It’s safe to say that most of us probably know of a couple who met through mutual friends, even if their relationship didn’t work out. Polly’s data shows that 13.7% of respondents met their spouse in this way.

Mutual friends can be a great way for people to meet their special someone. One reason for this is because some people are nervous about dating strangers. Knowing people in common can be reassuring for them, plus there’s a good chance they have common interests and have more to talk about, which can make for a much more relaxed atmosphere. 

Fewer than 10% of married couples met at school

9.8% of people surveyed met their marital partners at school. However, the data does not specify whether they met at high school or at college.

Research published by the Hive Law took a closer look at high school sweethearts in the US. The findings revealed that two out of every 100 high school sweethearts get married, less than 2% of people marry their first love, and 37% of long-distance relationships end in the first semester of college. 

Almost 4% of people met their husband or wife while traveling

For many people, traveling is one of their favorite activities, but only 3.9% of those surveyed tied the knot with someone they met while exploring the world.

The findings of a poll conducted among a smaller sample of people for a tour operator were significantly more impressive. This poll found that 20% found their spouse while traveling. 30% said they had dated someone they met on a plane, while an impressive 25% said they currently have a best friend they met while traveling internationally.

Nearly 3% of people met their spouse at a social event

Polly’s data reveals that 2.9% of people in the US met their marital partners at a social event. The data doesn’t reveal the nature of the events. However, if they were events such as book clubs, hikes, volunteer activities, trivia nights, or society meetups, there’s a possibility that they might have known each other through their mutual interests for a while before they started dating. 

Over 2% of marital partners met at work

Workplace romances are always a talking point, but the numbers in this case were surprisingly low. Only 2.6% said they met their husband or wife at work. In contrast, a survey published in Forbes found that 43% of respondents married someone they met at work.   The survey contained a few other interesting workplace romance statistics. 50% said they had flirted with colleagues, while 46% said they had romantic feelings towards a colleague, 39% said they had a secret workplace romance, and 17% admitted to having a one-night stand with a co-worker. 

Only 2.4% of people met their husband or wife at church

This low number is very much in line with current trends. In 2019, an Institute for Family Studies review stated that fewer than 4% of Americans met their husband or wife at church. The institute suggests that the decline isn’t due only to a drop in church attendance. Another factor is that women church attendees outnumber men, with women making up 61% of the congregation on Sundays.

Most respondents were age 65 or older 

The almost 500,000 people surveyed by Polly included a mix of age groups. While members of each group shared their experiences on various social media platforms, the graph below shows that those over 65 were the most engaged. 

Meeting and getting married is a hot topic for those over 65, with a top engagement rate of 23.2. In second and third place, separated by just a point of a percent, were 45-54-year-olds (20.4%) and 55-64-year-olds (20.3%). Ages 35-44 and 25 and below tied with 13.3%, while those in the 25-34 age group racked up 9.5% engagement. 

It’s interesting to note that the U.S. Census Bureau found that the estimated median age to marry in 2022 for the first time was 28.2 for women and 30.1 for men. This is higher than the median age in 1947, which was 20.5 for women and 23.7 for men.

Florida had the highest number of respondents 

40.8% of people whose responses were analyzed by Polly live in the Sunshine State of Florida. The rest of the respondents were based in three other states.

Of the other respondents, 27.5% live in Massachusetts, 26.9% live in California, and 4.8% live in Minnesota. These statistics make for interesting reading when compared to each of these states’ marriage rates. 

According to the CDC’s National Center for Health Statistics, there are 6.8 marriages per 1,000 people in Florida, 4.6 marriages per 1,000 people in Massachusetts, 5.2 marriages per 1,000 people in California, and 4.8 marriages per 1,000 people in Minnesota in 2022.

Wives 44% more open about where they met their husbands

There was a noticeable gender imbalance among the people whose responses were analyzed by Polly.

72% of people who responded identified as female. In stark contrast, only 28% of respondents identified as male, creating a 44% gap between the two.

Surprisingly, a Time survey found that 58% of men said that being married was very important, compared to 53% of women. 54% of women strongly agreed that a woman can have a fulfilling life without marriage, compared to only 38% of men.

Low-income earners had the highest response rate 

58.2% of the 494,874 people who contributed to Polly’s data were in the low-income group. According to Polly, this demographic earns $40,000 to $80,000.

35% of those surveyed who were married earn $120,000 to $200,000, while 6.8% earn $80,000 to $120,000. According to the Pew Research Center, men are the bigger earners in the majority of opposite-sex marriages.

In 55% of marriages, men are the sole breadwinner, while in 29% of marriages, both husband and wife earn approximately the same amount of money. In 16% of marriages, the wife is the main breadwinner. In 2022, the median income for all marriages was $121,000.

These statistics from Polly highlight the many places to find love - and they are just the start. You never know when you’ll meet the one, but now you know where it’s most likely!

About the data

Polly’s data was based on independent samples of 494,874 people from social media platforms such as X, Reddit, and TikTok. The samples focused on those based in the US and spanned 12 months, ending 20th May 2024. 

The responses were collected and analyzed to produce outcomes within a 90% confidence interval and 5% margin of error, and engagement estimated the number of people participating in the location. 

The demographics were determined using many features, including name, location, and self-disclosed description. Privacy was preserved using k-anonymity and differential privacy. Results are based on what people describe online—questions are not posed to the sample group. 

 Written By:

Anna Scotter